My Single Friends Ruined the Party
- By: Amanda Coscarelli
This story has been submitted by a LOOP reader…
I’m not here to hook up— I’m just here to dance with my girls.
I have a 9-5, a side hustle, and a relationship, all of which keep me both fulfilled and on overdrive all week long. I love the grind, I love the routine and I love the stability. I also spend more than half my week keeping up a safe-for-work reputation. So when my friends invite me out on a Saturday night, I’m ready to let loose and get a little crazy. What happens in the club stays in the club after all. I’m ready to dance, mosh, sing, scream and not worry about how stupid I look while doing it, especially after a couple of rounds.
But my single friends? They’re all about appearances. While I’m head-banging and shuffling to LMFAO, they’re busy fluffing their hair and adjusting their corsets so their rack sits just right. They’re searching the crowd for arm candy while I’m in the middle of the circle moshing with a random guy in a pink sequinned cowboy hat. And while people always assume that their friends in relationships never want to have fun, I’ve come to realize that our ideas of fun just look a lot different.
Our ideas of fun just look a lot different.
When you’re in a relationship, you start going out more as a couple and you start to see your single friends a little less. Don’t ask me why, it’s just the way it’s always been. Actually, I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that our priorities change. My single friends see our night at the club as an opportunity to find someone to go home with. I get it. We all have needs and my girls have no problem pulling whoever they want. They want to look their hottest all night— mysterious, sexy, a little playful but careful not to over do it. Meanwhile, my boyfriend is out with his friends probably hoping I don’t look too ridiculously hot but knowing I can’t help it. Kidding. But seriously, the club is my opportunity to be a little reckless and make unforgettable memories with my friends. I’m prioritizing recording ourselves so we can laugh at how dumb we look once we’re sober, and they’re prioritizing, well, not looking dumb.
There’s a duality to it all. The ability to be sexy and sultry and also fun and care free. The ability to turn heads because you’re stunning and also a little crazy on the dancefloor. The truth is, you’re probably not going to meet your soulmate worrying about how good your tits look. You’re more likely to connect with someone special when you’re unapologetically yourself. And that’s really why we’re all partying anyway, right? We all want connection. That unbeatable feeling that happens when the beat drops and the crowd all jumps in sync. We forget about our real lives if only for a few moments and make the most of the twenty bucks we blew on a mixed drink that’s finally working its magic.
You're probably not going to meet your soulmate worrying about how good your tits look.
For those of us who are boo-ed up, it’s not about forgetting our partner. It’s about getting back the time with your besties that you’ve been missing out on. My single friends can go out whenever they want. But when we’re all together, I’d like to be together.
In the morning, we’ll all be waking up in someone’s bed one way or another. I just hope next time, my girls are waking up in my bed, so we can debrief the night and laugh at ourselves until we cry.
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